Parenting is not for the feint-hearted, so they say… which implies to me, that every parent who plays the role of Dad, Mom, Grandad, Grandma, Step-Dad, Step-Mom, Surrogate.. the list can go on… does so with a big, bold courageous heart!
There are big challenges for families these days. Too many bumps and hurdles to count, plus all the distractions of today’s modern world which make parenting with intentionality even more courageous. I mean, think about it…. some of the challenges we face are mundane things like paying the rent, the mortgage, gas prices… things like making sure your kids get an education, the right socialization, the best sports team.. hello too many choices, feeding them right… hello another bowl of cereal for dinner! Plus the challenge many of us face with both parents working or only one parent being present… shall I stop there….
Take that big, bold heart of yours and have courage! We have laid out our top ten tips for Parenting in todays modern world!
1. Speak Destiny over your kids every night!
First, Numero Uno, Number ONE! Believe in your kids! They have a great and powerful destiny! Your kids were placed on this earth with a plan, purpose and destiny that no other kid before them has had. And you were divinely chosen to play a great role in this!
2. Lead by example!
Kids are great observers and very clever! They do what you do, not what you say. Period.
3. Teach them life-skills!
Your kids don’t know, what they don’t know. They are like sponges, they really do want you to teach them how to navigate the world around them. Sometimes it may not look like it, sometimes they will do the complete opposite to what you have taught them, but thats all part of the journey too. If you do not teach them, who will? People who don’t love you like them will, and it will hurt much more when they are older in the big bad world.
4. Give Love Freely!
Some families, don’t hug or compliment, but life is too short not to give love freely. Make sure your kids not only hear they are loved but feel loved too! Did you know hugging can help reduce stress and anxiety in your kids! Bet, It’ll even help you too! Build that connection, even when it feels awkward for your or them… not just a five second hug either.. be present for that moment, it matters!
5. Gather the whole family regularly
I know you’re busy, your kids know you are busy, we all know you are busy! Here’s the thing, even though you are, and even though there are mountains of things always to be done, if you can put your phone away for even just half an hour when you walk through the door at night, and give them all the attention they need, and you all get together as a family, you go a long way filling up each others love and attention buckets. It doesn’t take much, as long as it is all your attention. Plus you are building a team in the good times, that knows how to stick out the tough times together! Put those phones away!
6. Purposefully help each other
When you see your brother, parents or kids needing help, offer it freely. Nothing strikes more for family unity and family function than to actively help each other.
7. Never be personal in your moments of frustration
Keep the frustration situational, don’t attack your kids if they have done something wrong. Attack the situation, sometimes you have to do it as the authoritarian and expert and sometimes you can do it together. Frustrating times can be moments of learning and growing closer together.
8. Be a situational parent
There are four key stages of parenting that help you to identify when you need to make changes to how you are parenting:
0-6 Development stage
6-12 Golden stage
12-15 Unwired Stage
16-19 Transition stage
Prepare well for each stage. Understand that you will need to parent differently in each stage. Have a plan. Speak to friends or parents with kids who are older than your kids, they have navigated it before you!
9. Understand their personality
What are the traps for them? Are they bossy, stubborn, lazy. Mould them carefully and thoughtfully. Train them well, they may not know what their own traps are. Don’t beat them up about it, it’s your job to draw attention to what needs extra nurturing.
10. Celebrate the wins together!
It’s not easy being a parent… guess what… it’s not easy being a kid either! Make sure you do life together and when you are winning, celebrate! Why not! Build moments and memories even out of the little things. As Bob Goff says, “Love Does”. Celebration is love in action. Be that! :)
Sure, we’ve made it sound kind of simple, it surely is not simple, but If you can find ways to incorporate these 10 keys, we think you are off to a great start! For more tips on parenting, you may like to join one of Parenting Hacks seminars!
Our next seminar in partnership with www.influencers.church is in September 2019, to find out all the details you can click here: